My heart has been torn apart over and over again over the last month. There have been a lot of highs and lows. A high for me was when Jessie Williams gave his acceptance speech for the Humanitarian award at the BET awards. He gave me wisdom and hope. He made me proud to be black and strong. He spoke so eloquently about the struggles we face but also reminded black people that we have to support our community if we want to succeed and be taken seriously. I can respect that he spoke about systemic racism but he also educates black people on what we need to do as a people to be better. As if to say, we’re in a messed up position but we can’t blame everything on them. We have some ownership as well that needs to be addressed and reset.
Unfortunately, there have been so many lows. Unarmed black men are being shot rather than detained for their alleged crimes. Police officers are being targeted and shot based off of their race and profession. Racial tensions are brewing. Our nation is divided. Police are becoming scarier to minorities and more untrustworthy. I’m sure that we’ll see more black people being killed in the near future. It’s a vicious cycle that continues to repeat itself. Enough is enough! We’re never going to get anywhere if we keep shooting random police officers and unarmed people of color.
Photo credit: Google image
Over the weekend, I found out that I’ll be an aunty to a baby boy. I am beyond exciting because we have no boys in our family and I think it’ll be nice to have some balance. Girls are great, but I’m excited to have a little boy around. Later that night, I started thinking about all our recent current events and all the social injustices I’ve witnessed and experienced, even in 2016! This made my heart drop because I started thinking about that little black boy that will be coming into the world in a few months. I’ve heard the horror stories from friends and colleagues who are moms to black boys and men. One of my friends’ had to go down to the police station and inquire why her son was pulled over every time he was in a certain county. Trayvon Martin anyone? Luckily, she was able to rectify the situation before something tragic happened. This is new territory for our family, because as I stated before, we do not have any boys in our family. I’ve witnessed and am well aware of the struggles of being black man in America. But, when it’s your family, and I think of Tamir Rice and how young he was, it becomes much more real to you.
As excited as I am, I’m also scared to death. I’m nervous of the world he’s being born into. We all want our kids to be happy and healthy and I am no different. I want my nephew to be able to be an innocent little boy. I don’t want anyone to be fearful of him as he grows up or write him off as a criminal in the making. I just want my nephew to be able to grow up in a world where he doesn’t have to second guess if he was mistreated because of his skin color. He doesn’t have to wonder if someone doesn’t like him because of his race and he doesn’t have to fear for his life if he gets pulled over for a broken taillight.
Hopefully, we as a country can get to a place of mutual respect and the senseless murders can stop. If we don’t, I fear for the future.